cooking

  • If Looks Could Kale

    When I set my 2018 goal of working through as much of The Bob’s Burgers Burger Book as I possibly could, I went in knowing not every burger I made would be beef. We have a tradition in this house called Round Thing On A Bun Nights, and by “tradition” I mean “open acknowledgement that there will be nights I am too tired/busy/not-at-all-in-the-mood to cook”. So in the freezer are kept brioche buns that can be simultaneously thawed & toasted in about 4 minutes, and a selection of pre-formed patties of various proteins, meat-based and otherwise, that can go from freezer to pan to table in the time it takes to prep the toppings and thaw & toast the buns. Cheaper, easier, and less terrible for us than ordering pizza, with the added advantage of not requiring the putting on of pants to open the door for the delivery person. read more

    I was here and read this!

  • Hummus a Tune

    On Thursday mornings, my mom and I go shopping together, first to Grocery Outlet and then to Costco. Aside from the practical advantages of one fewer car on the road and me not having to buy my own Costco membership, it’s a chance for us to spend a couple of hours together hanging out, catching up, bitching whatever bitchery may be needed as a result of the past week’s events, and reaffirming our mutual belief that very few people in California know how to drive like not completely oblivious fucking morons.

    My mom is awesome. read more

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  • This is Ugly?

    Earlier this week, I signed up for a weekly delivery from Imperfect. They sell ugly produce considered not salable through more traditional outlets due to, as the name states, imperfections. By doing so, they reduce waste of not only food but water and land, help farmers get paid for more of their harvests, improve our entire food system in a lot of ways. I am all about this.

    Last night, we received our first delivery. And I am absolutely furious right now. read more

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  • The Disgusting Beautiful Garbage Angel Burger

    One of my goals for 2018 is to work my way through as much of The Bob’s Burgers Burger Book as I possibly can. But since another of my goals for 2018 is to not die a horrible cholesterol-laden death, I’m trying to limit my Bob’s burger intake to 2 or 3 a month. I made my first Bob’s burger on January 4, so I was definitely due for another. read more

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  • A Good Manchego is Hard to Find

    Completing the last of what little holiday shopping I do invariably lands me at a bookstore. My family exchanges books, always has, always will. I got about nine this past December, including a stack of cozy mysteries, Black Wave which I’ve wanted to read since one of my sisters raved so hard about it a year ago, and Rasika: Flavors of India which I am going to have all kinds of fun with, fun I shall post about right here on this very blog.

    This year, as I was finding goodies for my loved ones, my eye fell upon something I have wanted ever since it was released. That thing was The Bob’s Burgers Burger Book. read more

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  • Chuck Norris, My Kitchen Needs You

    The other day, my holiday task du jour was to reduce 3 1/2 pounds of whole dates to a mush the texture of which would hold a spherical shape when mixed with brandy and covered with chocolate. It is my third year making this particular confection, having met with varying degrees of success in previous attempts, all of which were delicious, if not texturally and structurally ideal.

    The first year, my Black & Decker 750 watt blender proved unequal to this task; the motor is powerful enough to pull a wagon holding three small children and a medium pig, but the blade assembly is badly angled for food chopping. I did not blame the blender, and quietly reassured it that as long as it continued to make me margaritas, it would always have a place in my home and heart. I finished the job with a large knife and some of the most exquisite strings of profanity ever uttered in my kitchen, already planning how different things would be next time. read more

    I was here and read this!